CHAPTER SEVEN — SOULMATES

The dark night affected my life tremendously. For the next ten years, I functioned at a low level in a state of emotional chaos. I was operating with a wounded soul. Many of my choices were flawed—life was painful. Once memories of the hidden trauma from the Dark Night were uncovered, my feelings began to return. I had no idea that overcoming this trauma would take almost two decades. When I was first diagnosed with PTSD in the 80's I felt completely damaged. I was embarrassed and ashamed. Eventually I bolstered enough courage to look squarely at this horrific diagnosis.

Wounds can’t heal in the dark.

After much research, I discovered that varying levels of PTSD are more common than one might think. Even so, I was not about to let this diagnosis define me. Instead, I chose to make it a catalyst for growth. I read everything I could find about PTSD while looking for other traumas in my past that might also need to heal. While lovingly comforting myself, I revisited all of the feelings I experienced during each wounding—it was gut wrenching. My diagnosis became a perfect opportunity to shine light on all festering wounds. Instead of being an embarrassing disorder, the healing work I did turned my wounds into blessings of strength. I learned that if a trauma is too painful to face at the time, we often repress what happened. Denial works temporarily for survival purposes, but repressed memories cannot stay buried long term without doing damage to our body, our mind, and our soul. If we want to become all we are meant to be, we must go back and face all of our traumas. It takes immense courage to dig deep enough to bring our darkness to the light.

My belief is that every negative thing that happens to us can ultimately be turned into something that makes us grow to higher levels of Awareness—something that makes us stronger. From dark to Light is the simplest way to describe this process. The spiritual meaning of every situation is: not what happened to us, but what we do with what happened to us. The only real failure is the failure to grow from the challenges we face.

After surviving multiple life-threatening accidents, my growth emotionally and spiritually started to move upward at warp speed—I was welcoming a new life. The dramatic shift in my belief system increased my ability to see more clearly. My intuition level was reaching new heights. I was experiencing a sense of freedom I had not felt since my carefree days on the farm. Excited about life, I had much left to do. I was eager to give it all I had. And so—I began my new life.

By 1996, I was ready to meet

MY SOULMATE

My Spiritual Partner